In “Give kids a holiday from divorce” (Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, October 25, 2015), Connie Schultz encourages divorced parents to remember that their children are more important than their hatred for each other. Although the holidays are cherished for the time that is spent with family, Schultz informs her audience of the suffering that children of divorced parents experience during the holiday season.
Schultz examines Halloween as the date that begins holiday-visitation negotiations; therefore, Halloween sets the tone for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Divorced parents are using the holidays as weapons against each other, “the more cherished the holiday tradition the more vulnerable it is to revenge parenting.” Schultz gets the point across that there are some divorced parents whose only concern is their children and blesses them for it.
Schultz explains that parents can become territorial, which can make children feel like it’s their fault the parents are unhappy. This can be especially difficult for children under the age of 6. Shultz also mentions how quickly children learn from watching their parents. Children have to learn the harshest lessons of marriage from their parents.
Schultz encourages parents to put their kids before themselves during the holiday season. Take the kids shopping for a gift for the other parent. And if they’re hatred for the ex is that strong, ask a relative to do it. A child’s bond with both parents is special. Schultz also stresses the most important reason why parents should put their own grievances aside. They want to form good and peaceful relationships with their children so that they can be part of their grandchildren’s lives as well.
Schultz tells a story about her own experiences divorce and grandchildren. The marriage ended but their relationships with their children remained in tack. The way they see it, they don’t each have 2 children, they have 4 children and 5 grandchildren. Shultz ends by expressing her own opinion about people outside the family that like to sort their children like poker chips. The moral of the story, it’s our jobs as parents to be a role model for our kids, so that they will grow up to be respectful adults.